The Doctor Is In Read online

  That reminder of their lunch date was all it took for Voncile’s mood to lift.

  “Oh, I’ll be prepared,” she said happily. “You have a good night, now.”

  Voncile left the office looking practically giddy—not like someone with a bad headache—but Kasen still had a lot on his mind. Voncile had wished him a good night, but in truth, he had no idea how the night would go. Kasen sat there feeling as if some things in his relationship with Raine were about to change. His intentions were to make the best of it that night, but he wasn’t going to hold back on Raine like he had done earlier. He wanted her to know the disrespect he felt, and if she wasn’t on board with the marriage thing, he needed specifics as to why.

  * * *

  Kasen’s appointment with Mr. Louis was another successful one. Mr. Louis had a fetish for wearing women’s clothing, and for the past three weeks, Kasen had assisted him with getting in touch with his deepest feelings. Kasen suspected that Mr. Louis was leaning toward becoming a woman, even if he hadn’t admitted it to himself yet. It was amazing to Kasen how many more patients were coming to him to discuss gender issues ever since Bruce Jenner had announced he was becoming Caitlyn.

  “I know that by being completely honest with you, I can begin to be real with myself,” Mr. Louis said. “This is just so hard, Doc, and I’m afraid to break out of this shell I’m in and let everyone see the real me.”

  “In due time I hope you will feel more comfortable. When you’re ready, you won’t have to fight this anymore. I think you will be surprised by how comfortable you’ll feel, as hiding who you really are only prolongs your misery and prohibits you from being the person you know you are deep inside. But until you feel ready to open up to your friends and family, I’m here for you.”

  Mr. Louis patted his chest and released a deep breath. “Thank you,” he whispered with tears in his eyes. “You have no idea how good it feels to speak to someone who truly understands my situation.”

  Kasen was masterful at his job. He knew how to make people feel that he really cared, but it wasn’t an act for him. He truly did care about his patients and their problems. Now it was time for him to pack up for the day and head home to deal with his own issues.

  In his car, he tried to call Raine to let her know he was on the way. He tried not to read too much into the fact that she didn’t answer either the house phone or her cell. He even allowed himself a momentary fantasy that she was naked in the tub, waiting for him to come in so she could surprise him with some bomb-ass make-up sex.

  Forty-five minutes later, Kasen parked his BMW in the four-car garage of the immaculate house he shared with Raine. It had set him back a pretty penny, but to come home to this every day felt worth it. The modern four-bedroom house with plenty of windows to let in a beautiful, natural light sat on an acre of well-manicured land. Kasen liked his privacy, so he had chosen a house that was far away from the city. It was decorated with contemporary furniture, shiny marble floors, and plenty of gadgets that made the entire place unique.

  He checked to make sure the alarm was off, then he touched one button to turn on every light on the lower level. Before going up the floating staircase, he used a remote to flick on the mounted fireplace. The music was next, and with the same remote, he pressed a button that spilled sweet melodies throughout the house.

  “Raine,” he shouted as he walked up the steps. “Baby, are you here?”

  There was no answer. Maybe she hadn’t made it home yet, he thought. He removed his jacket as he passed through the double doors of the master suite. The second his feet touch the plush white carpet, he could tell that something was wrong. The bed covers were a mess, the decorative pillows were scattered around on the floor, and a broken glass lay on the carpet next to a big red wine stain.

  He suddenly felt very disoriented. Raine was usually so meticulous. She would never leave the bedroom in disarray like this, and a stain on her white carpet? That would have freaked her out. Something was very wrong, he realized, and this feeling was confirmed in a hurry when he glanced over toward the dresser where Raine kept her clothes. Every drawer was pulled open, and as he stepped closer to it, he realized that every single drawer was empty. He whirled around and headed toward her walk-in closet with dread growing in the pit of his stomach. His worst fear was confirmed when he opened the door and saw nothing but the hangers where her clothes used to be.

  He raced into the bathroom, worried that he might actually throw up, and that was when he spotted the worst thing of all. The ring he had given Raine that afternoon was in the bathroom, sitting in the water at the bottom of the toilet bowl.

  “What the fuck?” he shouted, reaching in to retrieve the ring without hesitation. He wiped his hands on a towel and headed out of the bathroom, pacing wildly as he tried to put the pieces of this scene together in his mind. He just could not comprehend the thought that Raine might have packed up and left—until he spotted the letter on his nightstand and read the proof she had left him.

  Kasen,

  I’m sorry I had to do this, but you need to know that I have no regrets for leaving like this. After today, I realized that I couldn’t go on like this. I couldn’t continue to look into your eyes, make love to you every day, and pretend that our relationship was solid. The truth is, I refuse to spend the rest of my life with a man who I believe has been unfaithful to me. I have proof that you have been, and your whorish ways have caused me, in return, to be unfaithful to you. I never thought that I could love another, but the new man in my life has opened my eyes. He has truly been there for me, and today I decided to choose him over you. I didn’t want to be here when you got home, simply because I knew you would try to talk me out of leaving. But please know that my decision is final. This is a done deal, and you’ll be wasting your time if you ever come looking for me. The ring is one that I always dreamed of having, but under the circumstances, please do what you wish with it. Feel free to give it to one of your lovers, or place it on the finger of a woman who will accept you for the way you are. I am one woman who won’t, so good-bye, Doctor. Have a nice life.

  Raine

  Kasen did his best to read the letter through the tears that were forming at the rims of his eyes. It was difficult for him to swallow the huge lump that felt lodged in his throat. He knew that their relationship wasn’t perfect, but it wasn’t anywhere near the way that Raine had described it in the letter. The last time he had cheated on her was a few years ago, not long after they had met. It wasn’t anything serious. He’d met a chick at a bar, had sex with her that night, and that was it. She wound up stalking him for a couple of weeks, and then the chick found out who Raine was and told her about it. Kasen had some serious explaining to do, but when all was said and done, Raine had forgiven him. At least he thought she had.

  Now he realized that she had probably never trusted him after that incident. How else could she think that he had numerous other chicks on the side now? It was utterly ridiculous, in his mind. Sure, she complained that he flirted too much, and she was probably right about that. How could he not, when his job provided easy access to so many lonely and vulnerable women? Sometimes, when he was acting in a way their partners weren’t, listening to all their problems and paying them compliments, they responded with adoration in their eyes. On a few occasions Kasen had let his ego get the best of him and flirted with a female patient, but he was quick to check himself before things became unprofessional. Raine complained that he went above and beyond to please his patients, especially women, but Kasen assured her that he had learned his lesson after the first time and he would never hurt her like that again. Apparently his assurances had not been enough.

  As he read the letter again, his tears were replaced with a rising fury. It dawned on him that she could be using this claim that he was cheating as an excuse. Maybe she didn’t even really believe he was cheating, he thought, but instead she made that shit up so she could step out with another dude.

  Letting out a roar, Kasen tore the le
tter in two and threw it on the bed, then paced around the room, throwing wild punches in the air. “Fuck!” he shouted, spit spraying from his mouth. “How in the fuck can she do me like this?”

  After a while, he ran out of steam and flopped down onto the bed, panting and sweating. He picked up his phone, prepared to call Raine and spew every bad name in the book, but when he punched her number into his phone, it went straight to voice mail. He tried it three more times, and every time, the same thing happened.

  What the fuck? he thought. Did she block my number now?

  He pitched his phone into wall, causing the screen to crack. When he bent down to pick up the phone, he caught sight of the background screen, which was a photo of him and Raine from a few months ago, when they had taken an awesome trip to Las Vegas. He dropped to one knee, feeling like all the wind had been knocked out of him. How had they gone from those happy moments to this chaos in such a short time? He just could not wrap his head around it. His watery eyes fluttered, and as his tears picked up speed, he shut his eyes, covering them with a shaky hand.

  “Daaaamn,” he cried out. “What did I do? I can’t believe this is happening. Why me?” Kasen was broken. His heart felt as if it had been ripped from his chest.

  As he sat on the floor of his bedroom, still in shock, he began to reflect on everything that had happened that day. Now Raine’s reaction to his proposal started to make sense. Of course she wasn’t happy about the ring. She’d probably been thinking about the other guy the whole time she was standing there with Kasen’s ring on her finger.

  He felt like a fool. Why would she have played him like that? Why couldn’t she have just been honest with him and told him she didn’t want to get married? Didn’t she owe him that much honesty after all they’d been through together? Shit, if she had any kind of integrity, she would have told him a long time ago that she thought he was cheating. For a second, he imagined a conversation where she accused him of cheating and he was able to convince her that it wasn’t true; and then their relationship could have been saved. But he was smart enough to realize that it was just a fantasy—a stupid daydream that could never come true with a heartless, cheating bitch like Raine. That was what she had become in his eyes, now that his ego and his pride had been decimated. He didn’t use the word bitch often, but in this case, it fit her perfectly. He had given her his heart, opened up his home to her, and without a second thought, she had replaced him with another man. That, to him, was unforgiveable. It would be a cold day in the devil’s lonely hell before he ever let her back into his life.

  Chapter 4

  The next morning, Kasen found himself sprawled naked on the living room floor, with an empty bottle of vodka next to him, along with a photo album full of pictures of him and Raine. He remembered getting ready to take a shower the night before, but he figured it was safe to assume that he’d never made it.

  As he got up off the floor and entered the bedroom, he could still smell Raine’s perfume. Was he imagining the scent, or had her presence really permeated every corner of his room, or better yet, every corner of his life? One glance at the wine stain on the carpet reminded him that even if the scent of her perfume remained, she was definitely gone. From the looks of the mess she left behind, she had left in quite a hurry. He wondered what could have been going through her mind as she raced around there gathering her things. Then he remembered the words of her cruel letter and decided he didn’t give a shit what she had been thinking. All that mattered was that she had ripped his heart out.

  The last thing Kasen wanted to do was go to work, but he never liked to cancel on his patients, so he went into the bathroom to get dressed. Besides, work might keep his mind off of everything that had happened. He took a quick shower, put on a pair of loose slacks and a wrinkled button-down shirt that did nothing for his stallion-like frame, and ran a brush over his waves. Staring at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, all he could do was hope that no one would comment on his puffy eyes or his unshaven face, because he didn’t have the energy to do anything about them right now. It took everything he had just to mentally prepare for the long day ahead of him.

  * * *

  Kasen arrived at his office at ten o’clock sharp, and Voncile noticed right away that he appeared totally out of it. Voncile had never witnessed him looking so disheveled and distraught. She called his name, halting his steps before he opened the door to his office.

  “I don’t mean to pry, but are you okay? You look awful.”

  “No, I’m not okay, and thanks for the compliment.”

  “I didn’t mean to say that. What I meant to say is you look different. Sorry if I offended you,” she said.

  “It’s not a big deal, Voncile,” he said with very little energy in his voice.

  His zombie-like demeanor worried Voncile a little, but he obviously didn’t want her to pry, so she changed the subject. “So, Dr. Fields called to say that he was sending a young lady your way this morning. He said she’s in dire need of your assistance. I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to pencil her in, but he stopped by to give me her number, as well as her file. Are you able to meet with her?”

  Dr. Fields and Kasen were always recommending patients to each other, often when one doctor felt the other might be better for a particular patient. Kasen knew Dr. Fields wouldn’t send a patient his way unless she really needed help, so he didn’t want to disappoint his colleague or this potential new patient in need of help.

  “Sure. Go ahead and call her. What’s her name?”

  Voncile retrieved the file from the top of her desk and handed it to Kasen. “Her name is Patrice Davenport. Dr. Fields said good luck with this one.” Voncile resisted the urge to roll her eyes, but Kasen still heard the cynicism in her voice.

  He glanced at the patient file, skimming the first page, which stated that Patrice had left her first appointment with Dr. Fields after just five minutes. Apparently, she didn’t feel they connected. This woman sounded like a handful for sure, but Kasen was a little disturbed by the attitude Voncile was displaying. He preferred to approach every one of his new patients with an unbiased opinion. He wasn’t quite sure what was up with Voncile, but after what he had been through the previous night, he didn’t have the energy to confront her about it, so he chose to let it slide.

  “Thanks. Call her and see if she can come right away. I’ll be in my office,” he said and walked away without waiting for a response.

  Kasen entered his office still feeling completely out of it. He walked sluggishly to his desk and plopped in the chair. He tried to read the rest of the file that Voncile had handed him, but within minutes, his mind drifted back to his own issues. With Raine on his mind, he massaged his forehead and closed his eyes, thinking about yesterday. He thought about their encounter inside the closet of her office. All of his senses immediately went to that place. He could imagine the sweet taste of her nectar, and the soft, juicy feeling of her walls gripping him tightly. He imagined the sound of her moans as he slid deeper inside. As much as he wanted to forget about her, his mind would not let him. He laid his head on the desk and squeezed his eyes shut tightly, trying to block out the images of her naked beauty. How could someone so beautiful be capable of causing so much pain?

  A knock on the door startled him, and he lifted his head from the desk, wiping away the saliva that had pooled in the corner of his mouth. As he jumped up from the chair, he caught sight of the clock and realized he’d fallen asleep in this position. What felt like only a few minutes had actually been an hour. He plucked at his wrinkled shirt and smoothed the front of his rumpled pants.

  “Come in,” he called out, thinking it would be Voncile who came in.

  Instead, he caught sight of Patrice Davenport as she entered, causing his eyes to grow wide.

  “Are you sure it’s okay for me to come in?” she asked. “I didn’t see anyone at the front desk, so I knocked on the first door I saw.”

  Kasen’s eyes scanned the super-sexy woman who damn near br
ought him back to life. Her sandy-brown hair was brushed into a sleek ponytail, and her slanted eyes drew him in like a magnet. She rocked a soft blue criss-cross halter dress that displayed a healthy portion of her firm breasts. Her makeup was on like a work of fine art, and her mocha skin looked as if it had been dipped in baby oil. For a few merciful minutes, Kasen’s thoughts of Raine were washed away.

  He was almost speechless, but managed to invite the gorgeous woman to have a seat.

  “Anywhere?” she asked, shifting her eyes from the chair to the chaise.

  “Wherever you’d like.”

  Kasen studied her as she sashayed to the chair in front of his desk. His eyes were glued to her, until she was planted in the seat. She crossed her legs, causing her dress to slide to the side and reveal her cellulite-free, toned thighs.

  Kasen extended his hand to hers. “Dr. Kasen Phillips,” he said. “I understand you didn’t have a successful experience with Dr. Fields, but I hope you feel okay speaking to me this morning.”

  Patrice shrugged then licked across her full lips to moisten them. “I’m perfectly fine with speaking to anyone who can help me. I just didn’t get that vibe from Dr. Fields, you know?”

  Kasen nodded. “Dr. Fields is a very competent doctor, but sometimes it just happens that a doctor and patient don’t click. It’s not anyone’s fault; it just is. Hopefully you and I can develop the kind of connection that you’re looking for in a therapist. Why don’t you start by telling me what you’re here for?”

  “I’m kind of in a rut,” she started. “I’ll be the first to admit that I need some major help.”